Hearing then speaking

So hi. After a lengthy break I want to start blogging again, because I’m tired of not having a writing outlet. I don’t know what I’m going to write about, or how often, but I need to get back into the habit of putting words on the page (or on the interwebs, potato/potahto). Seminary has done a lot of good for me, but it’s also taken a lot of my attention obviously and my creative output has all but dried up. Going with that metaphor, it’s time to repair the well.

During my absence I sometimes considered with guilt why I wasn’t writing more often, and by that I mean, at all. I think outright laziness had something to do with that, but I did quite well in my classes so that’s not all of it. I think I can explain it as a kind of blogging existential crisis. I came to a similar point once with exercising — it seemed so futile, meaningless, and vain that I couldn’t get myself to the gym every day.

With blogging, I began to feel like I was just doing it to exercise my own ego, since when people like what we write we feel good about ourselves. At the heart of all my vanities, or most of them at least, is pride — in my case, an unquenchable desire to be respected, well-thought-of, smart. I doubt I’m alone here, but I can only speak for myself. For example, I don’t mind “losing” arguments with people or “being wrong”, so long as my interlocutors think that I’m intelligent. So what I’m saying is that I’m a self-important person who takes himself (and his writing) way too seriously.

But the thing is I like writing way too much to go without it. So I’m writing again, considering the weighty words of James:

“Know this, my beloved brothers, let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger — for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness, and received with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls.”

My blog presents an opportunity to listen, then to speak. Notice the prepositional phrase right at the end: “receive with meekness the implanted word.” Seminary teaches us how to proclaim with boldness the implanted word, but in truth that only happens after we humbly receive. Listen. Consider.

Come listen with me.

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